My classroom called life…Kingdom lessons

My desire is to abide

Are you FREE? (Part I) July 4, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — charredsmore @ 7:50 pm

Freedom.

 

What does this word mean to you?  Many different meanings to many different people.  Ask the same question to people of different cultures, people of different lands, people facing different kinds of struggle…

 

I ask you, “What does freedom look like for your life?”  “Are you free?  Really free?”

 

Hmmmm…this is the type of question that you ponder.  Don’t answer right away.  I’m not talking about that Sunday school answer either.  The one you know I want to hear.  I am talking about getting real with yourself.  I’m not even talking about a collective type of freedom either.  Not the type we blanket over our country, community, church, or even family.  I’m talking, the up close and personal freedom for YOU. 

 

So, I ask again, “Are you free?”  Just think on that for a moment, or two or ten.  I know I need to do the same. 

 

Where do we find freedom?  What brings freedom?  Is it given to us?  Do we achieve it ourselves?  Is it lasting?  Do we maintain it?  Is there a cost?  Is it expensive?  Do we experience it daily?  Can we experience it every moment?  Are there different kinds of freedom?  Can you be in a situation that doesn’t really appear to have freedom written all over it, and still be free in your heart and spirit?  Can people who are oppressed be free?  Do some give the illusion of freedom, but really they are in a prison of their own mind or spirit?  Can anyone rob you of your freedom?  Can real freedom last?

 

How do you measure a year? July 4, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — charredsmore @ 7:21 pm

seasons

Last night, I reflected on this past year.  The ups, the downs, the total turn arounds.  God is good.  There have been so many things that have shifted for me…in my mind, my spirit, my heart, and even circumstances.  I am thankful.  As I reminisced and played back the memories…this song rang in my heart from the musical, “Rent”.

Seasons of Love

525,600 minutes, 525,000 moments so dear. 525,600 minutes – how do you measure,
measure a year? In daylights, in sunsets, in midnights, in cups of coffee. In
inches, in miles, in laughter, in strife. In 525,600 minutes – how do you
measure a year in the life?

 

 

 

 

 

How about love? How about love? How about love? Measure in love. Seasons of
love.

525,600 minutes! 525,000 journeys to plan. 525,600 minutes – how can you measure
the life of a woman or man?

In truths that she learned, or in times that he cried. In bridges he burned, or
the way that she died.

It’s time now to sing out, tho the story never ends let’s celebrate remember a year in the life of friends. Remember
the love! Remember the love! Remember
the love! Measure in love. Seasons of love!

Seasons of love.

 

 

 

 

9 Dresses July 4, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — charredsmore @ 7:00 pm

bridesmaid dresses

 

In  May I was able to travel up north to be a part of Stacy’s wedding.  Stacy and I  met while on a summer project with Campus Crusade for Christ in 2002 in Boulder, CO and have remained good friends ever since.  I am so blessed by her relationship with Tim…in many ways. 

 

This was the 8th wedding I have had the privilege to be a bridesmaid in.  Not quite 27, like the movie, but eight.  It is a wonderful thing to have so many close friends that would ask me to witness their special day.  God creating a covenant between man and woman.  I love it!  I love seeing love displayed.  Not that mooshy kind of love you see in the movies either.  That’s not real.  Go on a couple romantic dates and end up in bed together.  That’s not real love.  Real love is sacrifice.  Real love is patient.  Real love respects.  Real love waits.  Real love places the other person first.  Real love is a CHOICE not a feeling.  Sure, there will be attraction, there will be sparks and maybe even some fireworks.  But, come on…what happens when you wake up next to this person after 1o years and you are no longer feeling all those butterflies and magic?  Yea, you choose into love. 

You “choose in” to this relationship that you committed to. 

Is it difficult? 

You bet. 

Is it probably the hardest relationship you will ever encounter? 

Absolutely. 

Is it worth it? 

I think so. 

Then again, who am I to answer, I am single.

 

I will wear my ninth bridesmaid dress this fall when my beautiful roommate Stacy gets married to her wonderful fiance, Jesse.  (I just realized I will have been in three consecutive weddings for my good friends/sister who share the name ”Stacy” – interesting.)  Stacy and I have been roommates and best friends for about five years.  It’s crazy to think that I have had the same roommate for that long and in different states.  Oh, this friendship has been put together by God…I will have to write a seperate blog about that. 

 

Back  to my original thoughts on love…I am amazed at the orchestration of God in how He puts people together.  It is amazing to watch.  Have you ever seen Him bring two people together…two people that compliment each other so perfectly?  I have.  It’s fascinating. 

 

To those 8 (and soon to be 9) sisters that have asked me to stand and witness your marriage being established…I love you.  I am thankful for you.  I am standing with you in prayer, trusting that God will allow the places of intimacy between you and your husband grow and mature, as you grow in the love with the Lord.  I pray He is on display in your love.

 

LifeSkillz – Praying for Transformation July 4, 2009

Filed under: Cairo Kids, Ministry Stuff, Youth — charredsmore @ 6:37 pm

transformation

 

As I shared bits and pieces of my testimony with the students, their eyes were wide and some of them had open mouths. 

 ”Who is this girl you are talking about?”

 ”Yea, I feel like I am talking about a different person…” 

During our LifeSkillz class that Coraviece and I are conducting in Mounds and Cairo, we have opportunity to teach the students about a lot of cool stuff.  I am amazed at how this has all worked out.  I mean, come on…I was about to meet with a group of teen girls this summer and do exactly that – teach them about positive decision making, myths of drug use, peer pressure, sex, STDs…and now I can actually get paid for it.  Praise Jesus!

 

God opened the door for me to share a little about some past experiences.  My only hope is that they learn from my terrible mistakes and make better ones.  Also, that they would see the glory of God in my life.  That He is the one that turned me around. 

 

After LifeSkillz, one of the gals was helping us unload our stuff at Cora’s house.  We got to chatting about quite a few things.  She asks us why we are so concerned about what the teens are doing. 

 

“Why are adults always giving advice, can’t we just learn from our OWN mistakes?”

 

 I began to share with her how I grew up in the church and yet didn’t understand who Jesus was and why he died on the cross and why that mattered in my life.  I told her that IF an older woman would have come into my life to share the truth about Christ, maybe I wouldn’t have made such poor decisions.  I told her with passion, how much I loved her and wanted to see her make good choices and not suffer the consequences that I faced as a teenager.  We talked about a lot of things and prayed before we left.  Overall, I am just in awe, watching God touch the lives of these teenagers. 

 

It is just beautiful. 

 

Please, continue to pray for these teenagers.

 

Summer Time May 27, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — charredsmore @ 7:12 am

DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince

“Summer, summer, summer time.”  That Fresh Prince song is running through my mind right now…only 1 week left of school!

 

I have realized what a gift it has been to work this last quarter at the Cairo JR/SR High School.  Of course I never would have thought of this in my five year plan, but I have tried to throw those types of ideas to the Holy Spirit and be lead by Him and not my own thoughts or imaginations.  Not that ideas or personal aspirations are a bad thing…but when it comes to expectations in life, I have learned to follow the leading of the Lord and not my personal goals.  I have never been disappointed.  At the time it doesn’t always seem to make sense or even be the most desirable option…but it is always the most rewarding.

 

I have learned a bit more of the “ins and outs” of CJSH, students really will test you and push your buttons (even when they have known you for the past four years as a missionary), pencils are a hot commodity, and bringing a positive attitude to school affects the whole day.  I feel that I have a lot more to learn, but am thankful for the expeirence I was given to finish this year with the students.

 

As for a quick update:

1.)  I have been hired to work Summer School, without even applying.  Ha!  I love how the Lord hooks me up like that.  Come on!

2.)  I have officially been hired to work as the Jr. High Math Teacher for next year.

3.)  I turned down the opportunity to teach in Korea (over the summer for a month), which seems funny because everything about it “seemed” perfect.  I really didn’t have a peace about it, didn’t feel the glory on it and had to turn it down.  I know there are specific assignments for me here in Cairo and the states.

4.)  Praying about getting another job or two.

5.)  Hoping to travel a little bit before school starts – going back up north to visit the fam. and friends and maybe a little trip somewhere else too.

6.)  Learning PATIENCE and PERSEVERANCE!

7.)  God is opening up doors at the school.

8.)  Still praying for surprises.Summer

 

Lessons learned in the classroom. April 28, 2009

Filed under: Adventures in Teaching — charredsmore @ 6:14 am

book 

 

In only a few short months, I could fill a book with the wonderful lessons I have learned through my teaching experience at Cairo Junior/High School. It’s ’s a God given assignment…therefore I know I am in the right place at the right time.  True, some days I want to run out of that building, never to return, but I am learning how to deal.  Those days are slipping away.  The students are interesting…the things they face on a daily basis most of us wouldn’t understand.  They cope, they deal, they struggle, they complain, they wine, they fuss…for most of them this is all they know.  It’s all they’ve seen modeled to them in their homes and community.

 

If your environment growing up was this town….if this is all you saw…how would you know any different?  Their norm has shifted.  Cairo has somehow become their normal.  Cairo Jr/High School has somehow become their “normal”.  From generation to generation these ideas of “normal” have been passed down.  Sad.

 

For those who have not yet visited Cairo, you are probably wondering what I am referring to as “their norm.”  Come on over and see for yourself.  I began to type some examples, then thought better of it.  I need to take some of my own advice.  On the top of my chalk board, I have written “SPEAK LIFE.”  The students are so accustomed to speaking negative things to each other and over themselves, that I wanted to encourage and remind them to speak words that bring light, life, love, and encouragement.  SO, I must do the same.  There is a balance of speaking things that are true and things that ought to be, I shall SPEAK LIFE. 

 

Praise the Lord that each day in my classroom is a day of refinement.  Hopefully for my students…but definitley for me.  I am more aware than ever of my actions and words.  Each day my words and actions are on display for over 50 students to observe and I must be on my toes.  At times when I want to be funny I get sarcastic…this is getting refined as I see it is not always beneficial.  There is a balance.  At times when I get frustrated at the students, it is easy to get angry in my spirit…I must choose unconditional love.  Of course there is discipline.  I mean, without discipline, we would be quite rebellious doing our own thing.  There is discipline in LOVE from the Father, I am learning from Him how all that blends together. 

 

I am learning to love.  That 1 Corinthians type of love.  Love that does not hold a records of wrongs.  Each day the students come back into my class, I try to have a fresh perspective, new mercies.  Of course, this is difficult, but by God’s grace I try.  Love that is not boastful or proud or rude.  Love that leads to repentance.  I want to overflow the Father’s love in my classroom to my students.  They sometimes have a hard time understanding or accepting that love.  I guess we all do.  I mean, when we do wrong and someone loves us still…that leaves us questioning.  It leaves us squirming.  It leaves us speechless.  No words can describe how we comprehend God’s love for us.  Even when we were God haters, sinners, corrupt from our flesh…

He poured out His wonderful love,

                            He spilled his blood for us to live a life with Him FOREVER. 

                                                     Incomprehensible. 

                                                                         That’s the kind of love I want to flow in everyday. 

 

Let me be a vessel for you to pour your love out Lord.  Let me yield to you.  Let me speak LIFE.  Let me be your bright shining light for others to be drawn nearer to you Lord.

 

 

Spring Break…change of plans April 13, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — charredsmore @ 11:30 pm

knoxville-tn

 

Yes, it is my spring break this week!  Hallelujah!  I have just started working at the school and already I get a break.  How sweet is that?!?
At first, I was going to Cali. to run my half marathon…but things have shifted.  I didn’t feel a peace about heading out to Cali, although I REALLY wanted to go.  Plus, I had no denero.  So, I am about to head to visit some friends in Knoxville, TN.  Like I am heading out the door NOW! 

 

Praying I will be a blessing to my friends there and that I will be refreshed and renewed for the last hurrah as I come back to finish the school year.

 

I will update more as the week unfolds.

 

Hope you had a wonderful RESURRECTION DAY friends!

 

What things in your life are you asking the Father to resurrect?

 

It all started with a freezy pop… April 11, 2009

Filed under: Ministry Stuff — charredsmore @ 5:06 am

 freeze-pops

 

I miss Elmwood! 

 

Seriously, the first time I went to the Elmwood Housing Projects, I knew there was a unique connection.  There was something pulling me there to love the children and teenagers in that place.  I was overwhelmed with the Father’s heart of love, five years ago when first passing through the Housing Project.  As Stacy, Heather, Joel and I did an attempted outreach, passing out freezy pops on a hot summer day, my heart sang.  I was overwhelmed with hope for these people. 

 

 

Sure, I was naive, and had no idea what their daily struggle looked like. 

Sure, I was white, they weren’t. 

Sure, I came from the north and a totally different culture altogether growing up in the “burbs.”

Sure I had lived in the same house all my years of growing up and had “stability”, which these kids did not. 

Sure, I thought I had something to offer. 

Sure, I was filled with misconceptions and pride. 

I asked the Lord if I ever came back to Cairo to live (which was TOTALLY NOT ON MY RADAR at that time as I was about to live in S. Minneapolis for a year), could I have a ministry at Elmwood.  He heard and answered that heart cry.

 

A year after the freezy pop outreach…

map-of-il

I find myself living in Cairo.  The very place I was thanking my God for NOT sending me the year before during my internship with GreaterWorks.  Stacy, Heather, Joel and I lived in South Minneapolis and worked in the main office for YouthWorks.  Great experience, that’s a story for another day.

The Two Rivers Team decides to split up into teams of two and divide up the town and hit the streets for a prayer walk – EVERY WEDNESDAY!  Yea, this was certainly a lesson in perseverance as many days we (or some on the team) didn’t want to go out.  Evangelism and outreach is my thing.  God just built it in me.  I usually don’t get too nervous or afraid, I just love to go out and talk to people about Jesus and pray for them.  I’m no expert and I have a lot to learn, but I am pretty much addicted to this stuff.  When I see God touching people and ministering to them, this little girl in me gets all excited and giddy.  I can’t help it.  Guess where me and my partner are assigned? 

 

That’s right, Elmwood! 

 

We would knock on doors asking people if they needed prayer for anything.  You would have been shocked and pleasantly surprised by the response of these community members.  I mean, here we are, two white girls from up north with a funny accent, asking people who we have NEVER met if we can pray with them.  The response, many received prayer right there in their doorway, many welcomed us in their homes!  This was quite the opposite response to some other community members who shared the same skin color, were “well to do”, and had their “own church”.  I’m not upset about it, just reflecting on how interesting things work out sometimes.  We did the prayer walk thing for about a year or more (in that structure).

 

Four years after the freezy pop outreach…

I am getting my homeroom class started for the day (Jr. High Math), and one of my boys blurts out…”I remember you coming to Elmwood Ms.C!  I remember you walking around with a cooler filled with freezy pops.  You were with some other people, walking around and talking to the kids at Elmwood.”  I had to hold back the tears as we recounted that day, five years ago.  Here, this student remembered us coming through the projects, with a feeble attempt at loving our “neighbor”.  And here I am teaching this student.  Seriously, I never thought I would even be in Cairo over a year, and I certainly never thought I would teach in this town (or any town for that matter). 

WOW!  God is so GOOD! 

 

Just yesterday some of us ventured back into Elmwood.  It had been a while, since our summer outreach program, summer meal program, children’s ministry, and even worship ministry at Elmwood.  It’s really been a while since we have done some ministry up in that place.  You see, Elmwood is probably on my top five places in Cairo.  It’s not just a place for ministry.  It’s a place where I receive too!  I have friends that are prayer warriors there that will lift one up for me.

 

Jesse has been doing some outreach on his own lately.   Seriously, this brother is steadfast.  He was going out to different places in town on his own, just trying to win some by the power of the Holy Spirit.  It’s probably hard to go out as a brother.  You approach ladies, and they wonder why you are talking to them…it could get funny.  You approach the men…they wonder why you are talking to them…it could get funny.  See what I’m saying.  I believe it is MUCH better to go out in twos, and male/female groups are the best for reaching both men and women.  Just my opinion. 

 

We hit up Elmwood again.  This time it was Jesse, Stacy and myself.  IT was good stuff.  I was able to reconnect with a couple parents (of my Jr. High students) and some old friends.  I spent most of my time with Phylis.  She’s one of the warriors I was telling you about.  A Grandma who isn’t afraid to tell it like it is.  I’ll have to write a whole blog about this amazing woman of God.  Stacy and Jesse played with some children and were also able to encourage an older gentleman at Elmwood. 

 

God, continue to bless the families in Elmwood and raise up a Spirit of Praise in that place.  I believe that PRAISE will be their weapon in fighting the enemy.  Protect them, provide for them, love them.  Open their eyes to who YOU are JESUS!

 

SMG: Day 70 April 11, 2009

Filed under: Surprise Me God - Round II — charredsmore @ 4:37 am

Happy Birthday to me!  This was a little bit ago, but I wanted to give a quick b-day story.

SO, by now if you know me, you know I like surprises.  It’s probably one of my love languages.  It doesn’t have to be extravagant or “out there elaborate”, but just a surprise, something out of the ordinary.  I like doing that sort of thing for other people and I like it when they do it for me too.  Sometimes, you have to switch things up, in how you show other people your love…in how they best recieve.  Anyway, mini sermon is finished, on to the b-day.

 

Stacy and Jesse (my roommate and her bf) planned this surprise for me, but the whole team was a part of it.  When you live in a small town and have little money, your fun evenings tend to get a little on the creative side.  So, my friends kidnapped me and put a blindfold around my eyes as they drove me around to different community member’s homes.  It was really a fun blessing to go around visiting with community friends on my b-day.  We have been able to invest in people’s lives, but also build friendships where the giving and receiving is mutual.  I was major blessed by our evening journey as we went from house to house and closed the evening at Kristy’s house. 

Thanks ladies and gentleman for a wonderful night of b-day blessings!

 

 

Update on School Stuff:

No, I am not 30 yet…people seem to freak out a little when they get there. I hope I am not one of them. I had a sweet day filled with surprises and blessings. My students were mostly on good behavior at school, until I got to the afternoon. That’s usually how the story goes. They get a little excited and anxious to get out of the building…I think I need to start incorporating some exercises or something to get them a little more active. They need something. Anyway, so the afternoon came around and we had PBIS…still not sure what that stands for, I am sure Ms. G can help a sister out (if she is reading this :) . Basically PBIS is a way to reinforce positive behavior. The students who are not on the “naughty list”, meaning they have not recieved a detention, referal, or suspension in the last month are able to participate.  Now, you would think that the majority of the students would be involved…more like half.  It’s a sad story…ever Tuesday and Thursday the detention list is announced from the loud speaker, the list is very long.  It doesn’t seem to phase the students (some of them anyway).  At the school we are really cracking down on tardys and other behaviors.  I hope it starts to work.  I pretty much lay it down in my classroom.  They think they can get away with stuff with the nice new teacher…no way.  There are so many parallels to the Father’s unconditional love and discipline when I am in that school…everyday I learn from my students.  It’s really a blessing, although difficult and challenging.  Three years ago, I would not have been able to do do this job, okay last year I would not have been able to do this job.  If I can now, it is ONLY by the grace of God. 

 

Note on Discipline:  I want to share a VERY important lesson I have learned while disciplining the students (espescially the boys).  When I am asking them why they did X, Y, Z behavior or telling them why X, Y, Z behavior was inappropriate they get a little funny.  They won’t look me in the eye and they try to get out of it.  I mean, some of them just flat out walk away while I am disciplining them.  What?!?  I would have NEVER even thought of disrespecting a teacher like that when I was in Junior High.  They don’t know what to do.  I think it’s a combination of things…feeling like the tough guy who doesn’t want to be geting repremanded by a teacher or it is a feeling of shame.  It is totally like that with God too.  We feel bad and we are in shame, we tend to want to run away in guilt and shame.  Man!  He loves us!  I love those teenagers!  I tell them too…”You know I care about you, right?!?”  “I wouldn’t be here unless I wanted to be.”  “I am choosing to spend my day with you all, because I want to be your teacher.”  You are each unique and talented in your own way and can accomplish anything.”  “When I discipline you, it doens’t mean I love you any less.”  “You’re all my favorites.”  It’s constant affirmation, but still, when it happens, they think I don’t like them, or they aren’t my favorite, or I am just picking on them.

 

Must give you updates April 9, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — charredsmore @ 10:02 am

sunrise

 

I have been major busy and a little stressed since starting my new job at the school. Nothing I can’t handle with the Holy Spirit.  It is tough being there…but it’s my assignment and I like it.

So, here’s the deal, I need to update you all on a few things.  These will come later…as I have to get to bed now.  Tomorrow is like our Friday before Spring Break and I want to make sure I am rested for the craziness of tomorrow.

Updates to come:

1.  SMG: 70 My Birthday Surprises!

2.  Teaching at the Junior High…man, I feel like I could write a book about the hilarious, inappropriate, disrespectful, hopeful, and refining moments within that classroom.

3.  Fresh Fire – Eddie James Conference in Birmingham, AL.

4.  Outreach in Cairo – that’s ’bout to happen tomorrow night.

5.  The TR fam.

6.  Spring Break…yes I am looking ahead.

7.  The Father’s heart in discipline.

There’s probably more, but I am going to bed now. G’night.

Love you.